“It is normal to feel this way at this point,” the nurse told her. “This is the moment when so many others have felt the last burden of their sadness, the one last time that it worsens before it gets better.”
“I would have wanted it,” she whispered again.
She felt Endan’s arms go around her. He remembered the way she had wailed when he had told her the truth in that medical room back on Station 2-4-6. They both remembered how she had lost control.
“I know,” he whispered into her ear, close, so that nobody else could hear. “I would have wanted it, too.”
Those in line behind her were patient, understanding her sadness, the weakness that it brought. Citlally steadied herself, looking up into the eyes of the priestess waiting for her. She felt the peace around her, the calmness, as though the waiting could have gone on forever and nobody would have minded. Then, at last, she pulled in a long breath and steadied herself.